crazy

theres just so much to do and so little time.
how ironic since all i've been doing for the past one week was sit around and do nothing.
isnt this always the case.
and at the last minute we freak out and tell ourselves that its ok and we wont do it again.
shit ass.
i hate myself.
and whats with the bloody weather.
of all days it just had to pour today.
to hell with it.it ruined my wonderful wonderful game.
i was doing fine.and the moment the rain came and we had to stop for a freaking hour.
it just went downhill like how a bombom would roll downwards.
damn.i mean yeah daddy was like it's difficult to play in those horrible conditions.
yeah i guess its just pretty disappointing when you screw up cos of the weather and all.
and whats with today being 060606. i mean yeah it only happens once in a lifetime.
and it just had to be a horrifying day huh.
ewwww.

ohwells.
enough about today.
well training yesterday was so darn slack.
but i loved it oh so much.
yeah baby.
and i have a good feeling about tomorrows training too.
yeah.last training before we rest for a month i think.
and i bet when we start training again.
we're all rusty and screwed up and have to do fundamentals all over again.
not that i'm complaining since somehow i love doing fundamentals.
but i mean stop training and trust me you kinda lose everything that you learn.
at least theres something to look forward to tomorrow.
NAD!!

ok and i guess i should really start prioritising again.
sheeshy man.
we have softball.
we have golf.
we have school.
plus we have so much more random stuff thats somehow draining my time.
screw my social life.
ohmygosh.
i really should start doing something constructive with my life huh.
instead of just idling.
i feel like a useless piece of trash at times like this.
eeeee!! (thats 5 Es.just goes to show how irritated i am.)

hmmm.
dearies,
yeah theres just so much i wanna tell you girls but just give me a lil bit more time to sort out my thoughts huh.
i'm all confused and messed up and my brain just isnt functioning properly now la.
with all the stuff thats happening.
i mean i myself dont even know how i'm feeling now.
and everythings just gonna come out a BLUR.(with me talking trash and the tears and all)
so erm just give it a bit more time.
let the insides of me chill a while longer and then everythings gonna come out nice and lovely-ey.
it will still be trash but at least without the tears huh.
i love you all laa!

much loves.
and after a long long day.
forgive me for sucha long boring and ridiculous post.
many apologies.
big bear hug from val.

sorry i never told you
all i wanted to say
and now its too late to hold you
cause you've flown away
so far away
and i know eventually we'll be together
one sweet day